two hands holding a paper cutout in the shape of a human head, with the brain illustrated in detail as a collection of leaves and flowers

The Influence Trap: How Fear of Judgment Holds You Back (and What to Do About It)

I don’t have a single client who isn’t rearranging the deck chairs at least once a year in some way. Org charts and responsibilities change often, and we wonder if the “reorgs” will ever stop. (Hint: After twenty-five years of doing this, I think the answer is no.) The art of influencing continues to be…

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Tina with actress Viola Davis

Myth: You Have to Please Everyone

People-pleasing is one of the fastest ways to lose yourself. We grow up believing that harmony is the goal—that keeping the peace means saying yes when we want to say no, softening our edges so others don’t feel uncomfortable, and putting everyone else’s needs ahead of our own. (Check out my post about navigating conflict.)…

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Many fingers pointing at a woman who is plugging her ears to avoid it all

The Silent Cost: What Avoiding Hard Conversations Is Really Costing You

Interpersonal conflicts in teams are inevitable. Throw together diverse personalities, competing priorities, and the stress of deadlines, and sparks are bound to fly. But here’s the thing: Conflict isn’t the problem. Avoiding it is. Consider this scenario that I’ve seen all too often: A team leader noticed that one of their team members was consistently…

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Discomfort Is Your Superpower: Embrace It to Grow

As we kick off a new year, millions of us are setting goals, intentions, or resolutions—roughly 66 percent of Americans, to be exact. Yet, the statistics paint a grim picture. By midyear, fewer than half will have stuck to their resolutions, and by December, only 9 percent will have achieved their goals.  That means that…

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Comfort Myth: You Need to Have All the Answers

What if the key to achieving everything you want this year isn’t about setting bigger goals—but learning to embrace discomfort? As we step into the new year, let’s shift our focus from setting lofty goals to building something even more foundational: our capacity to sit with a new mindset or practice. Goals and intentions are…

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Try This Leader’s Mantra: Don’t Get Comfortable—Even for a Day

Safe Ways to Test Your Discomfort One of my favorite leaders that I’m working with right now, a president of a very large division, shared something with me years ago that stuck. He said he strives to feel uncomfortable every single day. Why? Because he doesn’t want to get too complacent. He’s made it a…

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a post-it note that reads: Learn to say no

Protect Your Well-Being with 7 Boundaries

There’s so much we try to accomplish given all the hats we wear that we sometimes forget to practice self-care. We succumb to the myth that we have to do it all while forsaking our mental well-being. Here are seven types of boundaries and examples of how you might express them as you enter into…

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Think You’re Great at Team Conflict? Learn 6 Myths and 10 Hard Truths

Have you ever stopped to consider how many teams you work with on a given day at home, in your community, and at work? Studies suggest that 70 to 80 percent of our time at work is spent in teams or participating in collaborative activities, such as meetings, brainstorming sessions, and problem-solving.  While it’s important…

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mural of Bruce Lee

3 Steps to Living a Life That Inspires You and Benefits Your Teams

“It is not daily increase but daily decrease; hack away the unessential. The closer to the source, the less wastage there is.” If you’ve read the quote that I love by martial artist Bruce Lee above, then you can appreciate the next three critical steps to living a life of purpose. They’re not only accessible,…

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laughing friends at the table

Pull Out the Crock-Pot or Get on the Stoop!

Have you ever joined or hosted a potluck? When was the last time you invited neighbors, friends, and strangers to break bread and talk for an hour about just one topic? Does the thought terrify you? Make you anxious? Indifferent? Or just say, “No thanks, not my thing”?  When I lived in Chicago, I was…

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